Ten Principals

This is something that someone very special has written for me and has given permission to share with my blog readers to enjoy and truly appreciate. (Thank you, C. You're a very beautiful and special being.)


10 Principals of Relationships

1) Adapt the following rule to personal relationships: Before putting clay on a potter's wheel, pound it first to remove air bubbles, or what you create will crack in the firing process.

2) Aim for the I/Thou relationship where two beings meet one another authentically, without any qualification or objectification of one another. Rank this type of encounter infinitely higher than the I/It relationship practiced so often in our world (Martin Buber).

3) Apply this observation to people: Roses must open in their own time. Trying to force one open is an act of violence that destroys the rose and results in a well-deserved handful of thorns.

4) Apply this rule to those distant, but even more to those close: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud" (First Corinthians, 13:4).

5) Ask yourself in every relationship: "If I am not for myself, who is for me? And if I am only for myself, what am I? And if not now, when?" (Hillel).

6) Consider this metaphor: A 16 year old will gulp a glass of wine. A 60 year old who has genuinely matured will wait, enjoying in his or her mind first the sun in the vineyard, the songs of those who gather the grapes, the feel of oak barrels, the aroma, the color, the blush of the wine as it swirls around the rim of the cup. In other words, a 60 year old who has worked hard to understand life should have also learned that tremendous enjoyment is possible before taste and even without taste.

7) Remember: Aim to lead an ethical life..

8) Remember: "An unexamined life is not worth living." (Socrates, Apology 38a ).

9) Remember: "Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is not safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or it is nothing." (Helen Keller).

10) Remember while striving to live these ideals: Angels live in the realm of heaven; you are mortal and live on earth, so offer prayers of self-forgiveness every day for the innumerable times you will fall short.