Simple Kindness: #13

TREAT THOSE WHO ARE ILL AS YOU HOPE TO BE TREATED

We sometimes become impatient with those who have a long-term illness. We want them to get better and return to their normal relationship with us. When they remain ill, we can feel overwhelmed. If the ill person is not a relative or very close friend, we may let the relationship go. Many people do this, but we'd feel better about ourselves if we could accept our sense of frustration and loss and continue to be loyal and caring. We don't have to get involved in medical issues or arrangements unless we, the ill person, and their family wish it. We can maintain our friendship simply by staying in touch.


REMINDERS

* When a friend or acquaintance is seriously ill, call or write to say that you are thinking about them. If you're unsure of the person's condition, check with a member of his or her family first.

* Call ahead to arrange a visit. Bring a small gift such as a book or music.

* When you're together, try to focus on the person you've known rather than on the person's symptoms, changed appearance, or surroundings.

* Let your friend say what is on their mind. It is never right or wrong. It may be light or angry or fearful. You can provide comfort by listening in a careful and accepting way.

* If your friend doesn't feel like leading the conversation, ask about his or her family, interests, feelings about the news, or background. If your friend prefers not to talk, ask if you can sit quietly together while he or she rests or reads.

* Call, write, or visit again. If you would like to offer practical help, ask your friend or your friend's family what you can do.



SIMPLE KINDNESS=HOW TO BE KIND IN AN OFTEN RUDE WORLD