Angry, while loving another

I was meditating the other day and became aware of the fact that so many people are unable or haven't learned how to love another person while feeling angry at them or feeling frustrated with another. Some others are aware of their feelings of anger or frustration, but do not communicate their unconditional love for the other person by neither their words nor actions.

So many personality disorders and other psychological disorders, I believe, are born from one experiencing a withdrawal of love and positive regard form one's parents when the parent is annoyed or angered by a child's actions. This child begins to see the world in this way and many maladaptive schema patterns are shaped often manifesting in inappropriate views of relationships. These same children are often unable to feel love and anger towards others or for themselves. Many times, they then continue this pattern teaching their own children these schemas.

When we can experience these ambivalent feelings and can accept them we are grow as individuals. We can learn to be annoyed or perhaps angered by what someone DID rather than how we see this person as a fellow human being. We can learn how to express these angry feelings in a loving and caring way. We can also learn to love ourselves and treat ourselves with loving care even when we fall short of our desired goals and not resort to self destructive behavior patterns.