We are not our feelings

One of the most profound awarenesses that I have experienced is the knowledge that I am not what I am feeling at the moment. I remember when there was a time in my life, maybe not so long ago, when I would feel an emotion and feel somewhat powerless over not having to act on it or respond to it. Through daily meditation/mindfulness practice I have become aware of these ebbs and flows of feelings and emotions just observing them and refusing to be judgmental of them. They have a beginning, a middle, and eventually an end. If I just sit in zazen noticing and watching them I see that they are not part of who I am at all. They just float into my awareness and stay awhile and then leave when they are not interacted with.

I no longer feel as though I am riding a wave of strong emotions. I can view these waves from the safety and security of the beautiful shore. Waves can rise up and look very powerful but eventually they crash onto the shore and they are gone. The observer watching the waves from the shore cannot feel the wave's power and influence. He just watches and observes. The observer is just the observer; he cannot do anything but observe. He feels no influence from the wave. He does not decide what is a good wave or bad wave. He does not judge the wave he is just observing.

I can watch anger develop like a wave. I can view its qualities and not be thrown and tossed about by its power and influence. The observer does not feel anger in the waves. He simply notices this wave and waits for it to crash into the shore, lose its power and become a cool place to walk over on the warm and sandy beach. This is true for any emotional wave. The observer simply observes. He cannot feel anger and any other emotion as he observes. Yes. Certainly, we are not our feelings. We are really how we respond to these waves.