Looking

The Costs

 If you want the benefits of something in life, you have to also want the costs.

 

  Many people want the reward without the risk.  The shine without the grind.  
You are praised in public for what you practice in private. 
 You can’t have the destination without the journey.  
Instead of thinking about what you want, first consider: What are you willing to give up to get it?

Long Short Story

Never Too Late

Inhabit

Inhabit your life completely. 
 Don’t rent it out to the past. 
 Don’t let your history interfere with your destiny.
  Let today be the day you stop being a victim of yesterday’s circumstances and start taking action towards the life you want.  

The One You Have Been Waiting For

Forgive and Move Forward

 We often keep our hearts closed, not because we don’t trust others not to leave us, let us down, or stop loving us, but because we don’t trust ourselves to survive the pain of them leaving, letting us down, or not loving us anymore.  How ironic, considering that only by suffering through these very losses, do we come to realize our true strength.  
Truth be told, it takes a strong heart to love, but it takes an even stronger heart to continue to love after it’s been hurt.  If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart.  You are stronger now and better equipped to find the kind of love you deserve. 
 Bottom line: Don’t let the wrong people from your past keep you from the right people in your present.  Forgive and move forward.

Positive Change

Not Too Seriously

Laugh at yourself and at life.
Not in the spirit of derision or whining self-pity,
but as a remedy, a miracle drug, that will ease your pain,
cure your depression, and help you to put in perspective

that seemingly terrible defeat and worry
with laughter at your predicaments,
thus freeing your mind to think clearly
toward the solution that is certain to come.
Never take yourself too seriously.

- Og Mandino

How Much Do You Really Want It?

If you want the benefits of something in life, you have to also want the costs. 
 If you want the six-pack abs, you have to want the sweat, the sore muscles, the early mornings at the gym, and the low carb

meals.  If you want the successful business, you have to also want the late nights, the risky business deals and decisions, and the possibility of failing fifty times to learn what you need to know to succeed.
 If you find yourself wanting something month after month, year after year, yet nothing happens and you never come any closer to it, then maybe what you actually want is just an idealization, a fantasy, and a false promise.  Maybe you don’t actually want it enough at all, because you’re not willing to suffer though the work it’s going to take to achieve it. yourself wanting something month after month, year after year, yet nothing happens and you never come any closer to it, then maybe what you actually want is just an idealization, a fantasy, and a false promise.  Maybe you don’t actually want it enough, because you’re not willing to suffer though the work it’s going to take to achieve it.

Boundaries

Blaming

If you sit around for too long blaming others for the things they did or did not do, or know or didn't know, you’ll remain sitting in one spot until you die. 
 Placing blame is easy, because it means you don’t have to do anything; you just have to sit around for your entire life. 
 But that’s not living; that’s dying.

Surround

Contentment

Take time today to define contentment for yourself. 

 If you have been making a habit of looking to others for what makes YOU content, it’s time to give that up.  I promise, doing so will make you more content almost instantly.

How do I know this is true?  Well, let me ask you this: Have you ever met a contented person who regularly avoids responsibility, blames and points fingers and makes lots of excuses for their unsatisfying life?  Me either. 

 Content people accept responsibility for how their lives unfold.  They believe their own contentment is a byproduct of their own thinking, beliefs, attitude and character.

Unrocked

Adjust

1. Don’t base your attitude on how things are.  Choose your attitude so it supports and expresses the way you wish to be.  Frustration and
   
   stress come from the way you respond and react not the circumstance themselves.  Adjust your attitude, and the frustration and stress is gone.

Let Go

Actions

"Thinking will not overcome fear
 but actions will."

W. Clement Stone

Worth

If you feel like others are not treating you with love and respect, check your price tag.  Perhaps you subconsciously marked yourself down. 
 Because it’s YOU who informs others what you’re worth by showing them what you are willing 

to accept for your time and attention.
 So get off the clearance rack.  If you don’t value and respect yourself, wholeheartedly, no one else will either.

Success

Healthier

What Are You Practicing Getting Good At?

Choose to be miserable and you’ll find plenty of reasons to be miserable.
  Choose to be peaceful and you’ll find plenty of reasons to be at peace. 
 Think about it.

  Are you skilled at making yourself miserable?  
With those same skills you can make yourself motivated, effective and fulfilled.  

Version

Fear of Rejection

Has the fear of rejection held you back?  Have you ever been so fearful of what others might think or say about you that it kept you from taking positive action?  I bet you’re shaking your head, “yes.”

It’s time to change your mindset…

Today, the only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.  Prove yourself to yourself, not others.  You are GOOD

 enough, SMART enough, FINE enough, and STRONG enough.  You don’t need other people to validate you; you are already valuable.

If someone says “no” to you, or if someone says something negative about you, that does not change anything about YOU.  The words and opinions of others have no real bearing on your worth.  Certainly it can be helpful and desirable to make a good impression in certain situations, yet it’s not the end of the world when you are faced with rejection.

It’s great to receive positive feedback, but it simply does not always happen.  That’s OK though, because you know where you’re headed and you know your true worth does not depend on the judgment of others.  When you set out to make a true difference in life, there will be those who disagree with you, those who ignore you, and those who flat out reject your ideas and efforts. 

Ugly

Confidence

Confident people have no interest in pleasing everyone they meet.  They are aware that not all people agree on things, and that’s just how life works.  They focus on the quality of their relationships, instead of the quantity of them. 
 So never let the opinions of the masses define who you are or what you can or can’t do.  When you let go of the need to impress everyone, that’s when you begin to be truly impressive to the

 few people who actually matter.  

Change

I actually do NOT agree that "shady" people cannot change.
People change only when they accept complete responsibility for their behavior, make amends and strive to make the behavioral changes in their lives.
We, all of us, were once something or someone we longer are.

Carrying

Turn

Being Manipulated

There are emotionally manipulative people of varying degrees all around us.  When we are young we like to think that we are immune to the psychological pressures that confuse, manipulate and condition other people.  We are not so gullible, are we?  But part of truly maturing as an individual involves understanding how you too are led by the environment, influenced by others, and driven by the needs you have as a human being.

Human beings can be manipulated precisely because we share innate psychological characteristics that render us ALL susceptible, to a point.  Although, like any other weakness, some people are naturally more prone to succumb, while others have higher levels of immunity to the external pressures that can make us do things we would normally never think of doing.

1. Be aware that extreme “promise of gain” and “threat of loss” are basic universal tools for manipulating belief and behavior.
2. Understand that if your basic emotional and physical needs are not adequately met, you become more vulnerable to being manipulated by anyone willing to exploit this gap.  Just understanding this can help immunize you against becoming a victim.
3. Stay calm.  Breathe.  A calm mind can perceive the world much more clearly and objectively.

Character

Pact

It’s important that we forgive ourselves for making mistakes.
  We need to learn from our errors and move forward.  
Make a pact with yourself today to not be defined by your past. 
 Often the greatest gift to come out of all your hard work is not what you get for it, but what you have learned from the experience.

Time

No Obligation

Respect

Seek respect, not attention.  It lasts longer and it’s far more useful in the end. 
 Do things and build things that make a lasting difference. 
 And above all, never confuse popularity with effectiveness.  Being popular means you’re liked for a while. 
 Being effective means you have made a difference.

Inside

Work

Better, Not Bitter

If you compete with everyone else, you will become bitter. 
 If you compete with a previous version of yourself, you will become better. 

 It’s as simple as that.

Motivation and Habit

Kindness

Removing Toxicity

You don’t ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life.  It does not matter whether someone is a relative, romantic interest, colleague, childhood friend or a new acquaintance. 

 You do not have to make room for people who cause you pain or make you feel small.  

It’s one thing if a person owns up to their behavior and makes an effort to change.  But if a person disregards your feelings, ignores your boundaries and continues to treat you in a harmful way, they need to go.  

Perspective

Example

Approval

If you base all your actions on the approval of others, ultimately you find yourself running in place, sacrificing your own happiness. 

 Don’t put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket.  Learn how to say “no” to people and obligations that do not add value to your life.  Your time on this planet is precious. 

 As the saying goes, “What you do today is important, because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.”  

Healthy Inside and Outside

Re-Frame

Presence

One of the best feelings in the world is knowing your presence and absence both mean something to someone.  And the only way to let your loved ones know this, is to show them when you’re with them.

In your relationships and interactions with others, nothing you can give is more appreciated than your sincere, focused attention – your full presence.  

Being with someone, listening without a clock and without anticipation of the next event is the ultimate compliment.  It is indeed the most valued gesture you can make to another human being.

Fact

Detatchment

Together Time

Put down the smart phone, close the laptop and enjoy each other’s company, face to face, the old fashioned way.

There are few joys in life that equal a good conversation, a genuine laugh, a long walk, a friendly dance, or a big hug shared by two people who care about each other.  

Sometimes the most ordinary things can be made extraordinary just by doing them with the right people.  So choose to be around these people, and choose to make the most of your together time.

Sunlight